Why being a writer is bad for your health

1. Sit arse on chair and don’t get up.

2. Frown lots.

3. Drink too much coffee and eat too much cheese.

4. Go back to the kitchen and make another piece of toast.

5. Editing is more interesting with a glass of wine.

6. It takes years to finish a bloody book – I tell you, YEARS!

7. Your mind is sacred; your body is best left inside clothes; your emotions in check; your energy for the keyboard.

8. In other words: no distractions; no sex; no falling in love; no exercise.

9. Money? Ha!

10. Spend hours tapping a keyboard and talking to yourself.

11. Don’t talk to me. Don’t breathe near me. Please close the bloody door.

12. School holidays again? Fuck.

13. Did I really tell that total stranger my most dark personal secrets?

14. Writers are a bit bonkers.

15. Writing makes you more bonkers.

5 Comments Add yours

  1. Emily Benet says:

    Damn. This is all very true. I find running (between first and second half of a writing day) has helped me feel less bonkers and healthier… although I stopped for 3 weeks so on my last run, 5 mins ago, I felt like I was dying…

    1. lilydunn says:

      I do exercise – (artistic licence) – you have to, don’t you? Otherwise you really do go bonkers. But because my life is sooo dominated by kids (still, as always), I often prioritise writing. I’d love to do a yoga class, for instance, but time doesn’t allow. Running is the best solution – quick and easy, and you can think while you’re at it. (hello, by the way, How are you??)

      1. Emily Benet says:

        Yeah, I like the idea of a yoga class… but then again you’ve got to get there and get back and pay. What I love about running is it’s free and all over in an hour! If I had kids I’d also prioritise writing over exercise!

        We’ll have to meet up one of these days! X

      2. lilydunn says:

        For sure. Maybe we can run together (to the pub).

  2. Sadie Hanson says:

    Oh yes…. the school holidays. Thank goodness that’s over…… perhaps I can get back on with it now!?

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